Did you have sex?

Now understandably this may appear as a queer topic to feature in a blog. For some. Coitus or having sex is a biological-psychic need that is natural in humans. Yet it also occupies the realm of the intensely private - when we discuss the political or the spheres of the public-private distinctions.

For many it is also a moral issue - though how that turns into a public matter remain out of their reckoning. Or even ability to discuss. In many Islamic societies and/or argot democracies like India - the function of a natural, biological-psychic act to be discussed is frowned at. What causes those frowns, however, never have their proponents put forth lucid arguments.

Except vaguely plead for an infantile populace that is criminal as well as starved of sex! Sex, understandably, is an adult matter. It also, understandably, is a democratic one where express consent is taken to be as natural as the act of sex itself is. The finer but utter basics of what distinguishes the infantile & criminal, from the adult world.

Yet apart those, and partly involving those aspects as well, we recognize that having sex actually carries with it serious discussions about our psychic health. In how we seek as well as have sex, including how we view it. It also marks the lines where consensual is  a critical word. Not the personal challenges of the struggling religious neophyte, tottering upon his/her tenuous vow of celibacy & visits the precipices of sex, amidst the demands of the corpus vs his/her vows!

They too remain adult matters & the neophyte is expected to be aware of, or made aware of the consequences of his/her choices. But obviously those totterings around a neophyte's struggles aren't a social or political, but very individual ones. Definitely not what social or political discussions in democracies based upon the foundations of the adult suffrage (even if universal in some parts of the world that yet sheepishly beg to be recognized as still civilizing amidst its curse of an infantile-criminal populace & not an adult world) are expected to be so. Thus effectively banishing modernity & modern politics out of their realms, and scarce aware of this!

Outside such tragedies, the question holds meanings for young adults, as well as the adults of the human world. How & what we think about coitus or sex has a serious bearing upon how we view the world, and the individual relations to life & living that we seek to find a larger sphere of agreements around. For those that need to do so, i.e.

Thankfully most adults need not, unless entering into some club or profession built around having coitus or sex - and thus necessarily need to agree to some basic & common rules over conduct and/or payment. That as yet do not turn those into a public matter & misdemenour is a term that is what it is: misdemenour. It has to do more with attitudes & behaviour than of appearances. 

But apart infantile-criminal populaces that mark for most morbidities & human violence - the discussions about sex, roles and our approaches to those are crucial. Given its centrality as an adult exercise, we enter into discussions of the meaning(s) of adulthood, and thus of taste. If you think long enough about it - the last two actually occur around the public-private distinctions & the sacrosanct value of the freedom of the individual.

In many instances, discussions over sex & sexualities do actually entail advice upon & awareness of the healthy adult. Something which like sex, is biological-psychic and built around consensus as the key word.

Or the distinctions between the criminal-infantile & the adult, body-hair growth notwithstanding! Ever looked at any land mammal with hair so thick, its called fur? When we discuss morals in sexual attitudes with young adults, it is about a healthy adult that comprehends the value of the word consensual. That actually is all about it, apart, let's say, techniques! If some do. We do learn table-manners amongst others. We learn sex-manners too.

So, did you have sex?